The Code of Practice emphasises that professionals should “communicate honestly and directly” and “address issues promptly rather than letting them fester.”
Difficult conversations are an unavoidable part of professional life. Handling them well protects your business, your relationships, and your wellbeing.
Difficult conversations defined
Difficult conversations are discussions that involve disagreement, tension or risk, often about money, scope, quality or behaviour.
Whatever the specific situation, these principles may help you manage difficult conversations:
Know what you want to say and what outcome you’re seeking. Write it down if it helps. Anticipate their likely response. Be clear about what you’re willing to accept, and what you’re not.
Don’t have important conversations when either party is stressed, rushed, or emotional. But don’t delay indefinitely either.
Say what needs to be said clearly. Hedging and hinting creates confusion. But harsh delivery creates defensiveness.
“The invoice is overdue” not “You haven’t paid me.” “The scope has expanded” not “You keep adding things.”
There may be context you don’t have. Give them space to explain before pushing your position.
Follow up verbal conversations in writing. Written follow-ups protect both parties by creating a shared record. “Thanks for our call. To confirm, we agreed…”
When clients ask for more than was agreed:
“While you’re at it, could you also…” “We just need a few small changes…” “This should have been included…”
“I’d be happy to help with that. It wasn’t part of our original scope, so let me put together a quick quote for the additional work. I can have that to you by [time].”
“I understand it might feel like a small addition, but [explain the work involved]. The original quote was based on [original scope]. I want to make sure I can give this the attention it needs.”
The magic phrase
“I’d be happy to help with that…” Acknowledge the request positively before explaining it’s additional work. This keeps the conversation feeling collaborative, rather than adversarial.
When invoices aren’t paid on time:
“Hi [name], I hope you’re well. I wanted to check that you received my invoice [number] dated [date] for [amount]. According to my records, payment was due on [date]. Could you let me know when I can expect this to be processed? Happy to resend the invoice if helpful.”
“Following up on my previous message about invoice [number], which is now [X] days overdue. I’d appreciate your urgent attention to this. Please let me know if there’s an issue I should be aware of.”
“This is a final reminder that invoice [number] for [amount] remains unpaid, now [X] days overdue. I must receive payment within 7 days, or I will need to consider further action. This may include charging statutory late payment interest and pursuing the debt through the small claims court.”
When clients ask for something you can’t or won’t do:
“I’d love to help, but I can’t deliver quality work in that timeframe. The earliest I could realistically deliver is [date]. Would that work, or should we discuss what’s possible within your deadline?”
“Thanks for thinking of me, but this isn’t really my area of expertise. I’d be doing you a disservice if I took it on. I can recommend [alternative] if that would help.”
“I understand the budget pressure, but I’m not comfortable delivering work at that level. It wouldn’t meet my standards or serve your needs. Can we discuss what’s achievable within budget?”
“I’ve given this some thought, and I’m not able to take on this project. [Brief explanation if appropriate]. I hope you understand.”
You don’t always need to explain
For ethically problematic requests, a simple “I’m not able to take this on” is sufficient. You don’t owe a detailed justification, especially where safety, legality or ethics are concerned.
When a client expresses dissatisfaction with your work:
“I’m sorry to hear the work hasn’t hit the mark. I want to get this right for you. Can you help me understand specifically what isn’t working?”
If it’s a valid concern: “I understand. Let me [specific action] and get a revised version to you by [time].”
If it’s a change of direction: “I see — it sounds like the direction has shifted from our original brief. I’m happy to take the copy in this new direction. Let me put together a quote for the revised scope.”
If it’s subjective preference: “I hear you — tone can be quite subjective. Let me try some alternatives that might be closer to what you’re looking for.”
“I appreciate the feedback. I’d like to share my thinking on [specific point] — [explanation]. But ultimately it’s your call, and I’m happy to make the changes if you’d prefer.”
When you need to stop working with a client:
“After some thought, I’ve decided that I’m not the best fit for your ongoing needs. I’d like to wrap up our current project and help ensure a smooth handover. My last working day with you will be [date].”
“I’ve found our recent interactions difficult, and I don’t think we’re working well together. I think it’s best for both of us if we conclude our working relationship. I’ll complete [current commitment] and provide a handover by [date].”
“Following [incident/behaviour], I’m not willing to continue working together. I’m terminating our agreement effective immediately. I will invoice for work completed to date.”
* Immediate termination should be reserved for serious issues and may carry legal implications, so be sure to check your contract first.
Check your contract
Review termination clauses before ending a relationship. You may need to give notice or complete work in progress.
Difficult conversations get easier with practice. The key is to prepare, be direct, and focus on outcomes rather than emotions. Most clients will respect you more for addressing issues professionally than for avoiding them.
Remember: having the conversation early is almost always easier than having it late. A brief uncomfortable moment now prevents a major dispute later.